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I've said it before, and I'll say it again--until even I believe it.
Nobody knows what they are doing at any given time. Even the successful people who make their livelihoods telling other people how to fix their lives don't know how to fix theirs all the time, either.
When I was 12, I thought I'd have it all figured out by 20. When I was 20, I thought I would have it figured out by 30. When I was 30, I wondered if I'd figure it out when I was 40.
I'm 44 and-
- I have no idea what I am doing. I write 8 hours a day, 5 days a week for a liveable wage, but I'm not writing novels or books but SEO content.
I'm making art, but I don't consider myself an artist. I keep turning down commissions because I don't feel comfortable enough to take money for my art.
This sounds like I am a bit lost. I am. But in a good way. Nobody's figured it out yet. And if you're 20 or 55 or 18 or 33 and haven't either, it's OK.
I didn't get a full time job that I stayed
-at until I was 41. I lost the will to do Art in my late 20s. Found it again just a few years ago.
You'll figure something out eventually. In the meantime, keep trying. We're all just internally screaming wtf and wildly pressing buttons and hoping for the best, and anyone who says otherwise is probably lying. A little bit.