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I raise you Emperor Ferdinand I Armor, specifically it’s Codpiece.

I’m just saying. Sexualized armor is very historical.

Doesn’t make it and less ridiculous to try and be sexy in a situation where you need protection to prevent dying.

True. But it keeps happening.

I believe most full plate armor was hardly practical either, some being so heavy that basically required the wearer to be mounted. Most on foot soldier would wear chain armor with pieces of plate here and there, and thats only the extremely rich who could afford things like that. Full plate was also heavily limited your movement, many battles by extremely well geared soldiers were lost because they couldnt out maneuver barely armored militia, or even just rain. Knights wearing full plate needed help to stand if they were toppled! Its funny when people talk about full plate being ‘practical’ and ‘realistic’ when it was mostly a sign of status, ornamental and incredibly impractical.