Why do white ladies do that thing where they interject a reaction to a potential criticism before they finish their thought? I'm always kinda uncomfortable about someone assuming I'm going to be rude, critical or dismissive before they even finish talking???

@seagazelle Reactionary defense mechanism left over from being subtly taught since birth that we must apologize for taking up space and also that our ideas or opinions or even actual experiences can and will be reinterpreted for us, usually by a white man.

@meguey I definitely hear that thank u for articulating it. I come from a strong matriarchal cultural background so this (often Protestant?) behavior is unusual to me and I think I misinterpret it a lot as the person being annoyed at me

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@seagazelle I hear that, yeah. And the defensiveness can put ww on hyper alert for things that no reasonable person would find rude, etc, so it becomes oddly self-reinforcing in the ww's head. I've seen this in my own family and still fight against it as a "natural" reaction.

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